Hate alone is not enough to nourish. But there's rage too.

jizzle gizzle

2008-03-13T00:42:15

i do believe that julio gonazlez showed me some peace tonight. and i am sure that he didn’t use human growth hormone or pay an easy G per hour for a hooker. he probably did a bunch of other stuff that i don’t think i agree with. but he gave me what i was looking for. which wasn’t people flying planes into a building or a scapegoat or an easy way out. just peace.
and he quieted a bunch of other people. and peace and quiet seem to go together. much harder in new york than other places (i’ve been). but he shut them up. well.

made me question if it is more powerful for an individual to bring a crowd to speak or to silence.
or is it more powerful for an individual to speak than to be silent.
balance is the answer

oh i saw him very near to my current plot. a building that i was curious about. sensory pleasing all around.

Who? What? Where? When? Why?

Justin (mailto:justin@cornells.org) — 2008-03-13T00:35:20

i am thinking that #2 and #5 are most important

fair hike? i don't think so

2007-08-29T23:33:09

there’s a bunch of hubub about a fare hike by the MTA. this has me vexed about something i noticed a few weeks ago. every weekend, the MTA make a shit load of changes to the train lines to allow for repairs and stuff (http://mta.info/nyct/service/subsrvn1.htm). they post signs everywhere on the trains and on the platforms. they used to be 8.5x11 simple black and white notifications of the line being affected and what to do about it. a few months ago i noticed that they have pretty good quality color signs. sounds expensive, perhaps excessive. so i say to my self, maybe they chose color so that they could color coordinate the color of the subway lines. but no. they are all black. i’m sure it doesn’t even make a dent in the colossal bureaucracy that is public transportation but it seems unnecessary to me.

Survey Says.....No.

2007-08-17T17:28:21

i seem to have fallen into a bit of a medically challenging pot hole on my inspiration superhighway. endured another frisbee injury which is sad. very sad. feels like maybe i sprained my wrist or something. luckily this time i was not the only participant in my injury, there was a collision involved. So i was figuring on getting it checked out when a few days later, after enjoying a delicious eggplant dream wrap, my lower lip began to swell. big. like bubba gump big. this isn’t the first, nor the worst, incident so, being prepared with some meds, i popped a few benadryl and the swelling stopped. so did my dosage. later that night i had, of all things, sushi, with soy sauce running down my larger than usual lower lip. probably not the best choice in foods after an allergic reaction but i never claimed to be all that bright. before i turned in i popped another med just to make sure that things were cool. about 2 or 3 am i woke up and had a strange sensation in my upper lip. staring back at me in the mirror is what looked like a cross between bart simpson and a fraggle (i don’t know if those were noses or upper lips). i finally broke down and called an allergist who happened to also be listed under internal medicine (two birds, one stone?). he shot me with a few things (roids) and ordered a few tests and checked my hand and ordered an xray. he tested me for a few things and confirmed things i knew make me itchy (cats, mold, mites).
next i called my insurance company to find out which facilities accepted my insurance and the girl on the phone searched around and confirmed that i was going to facilities in the ‘plan’. she mentioned that in the future i could call the facility for more up to date information because their systems are not real time. get a sense o satisfaction because i’m finally using the benefits that i’ve been working for over the last six years.
went and got an xray yesterday. blood tests this morning (filled at least ten vials). i’m starting to think this taking care of medical stuff is not that bad.

now it’s friday afternoon. i’m tired from the drugs and extra effort needed to operate with a limp arm. home from work and looking to relax with a book and i get a call from an toll free number and answer. empire blue cross blue shield has hired an independent auditing company to conduct a survey regarding their customer service. 3 days after i called them about where i can have blood tests and xrays done. i can’t imagine that anyone calling customer service locate a place to remove their colon or breast might have reacted to this but i for one was a little pissed off. leave me the hell alone. let me heal. and put some of your survey money into lobbying for universal health care or something.

iWatchit

2007-05-11T09:20:27

everytime the iroomba comes up on woot! i hesitate for a few seconds and the let it sell out while i read reviews and manuals trying to figure out if it’ll be worth while. everytime, that is, until the last time. i bought one during the last woot-off.
i didn’t even own a vacuum so the cost of a vacuum helped me justify the purchase. i suppose most purchasers justify the purchase based on the claim that it will save them time. i cannot make that claim.
when i set the thing up for the first time, i spent 20 minutes perfecting the location of the home base (it fits nicely under my bed). once that task was complete, i pressed the clean button on the remote control and proceeded to watch the robot navigate under and around the 9 legs of my desk and chair and move to the next room bouncing from wall to wall. i probably watched for 40 minutes. hows that for a time saver?
i’m not a super busy person where i can say that i don’t have enough time to sweep my floors and my place isn’t that big so it isn’t a huge production to pull out the broom and clean the floors.
so i guess this is really just a productive form of entertainment for me. the $99 cable package that i pay for but haven’t watched in two months doesn’t clean my floors, just my bank account.

Too hungry to follow the herd

2007-03-19T16:21:44

http://money.cnn.com/2007/03/13/magazines/fortune/pluggedin_murphy_terror.fortune/index.htm?postversion=2007031311

this article explains that successful suicide bombers usually have a better education than the ones who are caught. i take two things from this: 1) success in education does not imply intelligence but is more probably a sign of a mind that follows rules and is easily controlled, 2) the poor are too occupied with survival to succumb to the fear tactics of religious/political fanatics.

A better mouse trap.

2006-11-17T16:48:33

while starting my car yesterday, i heard squealling rubber for a moment which stopped and then came back for good about 10 seconds later. i disengaged the ingintion and popped the hood to investigate. somehow the belt had worked itself loose and was stuck between the pulley and the engine block.
i noticed something long thin at the bottom of the engine compartment coming out from beneath the radiator. figuring it was part of the belt, i reached down and picked it up only to find that it had some weight to it and it was furry. as my urban instincts kicked in i realized it was a rat so i dropped it. this new information in hand and a closer inspection of the “grease” is noticed scattered around the engine compartment revealed that the grey and red substance was probably rat guts. with the help of bobby, local beggar, i got the belt back on to the pulleys.
now it’s time to clean up the mess, so i equipped myself with a shopping bag to pick up and dispose of the remains. turns out i was only able to find half of the victim. i’m guessing the other half will reveal itself gaseously.
i’ll probably need to get the engine steam cleaned.

prepare for the worst, hope for the best

2006-09-06T14:33:08

i sometimes justify my gloomy outlook on not wanting to be disappointed. expect the worst so when it happens you’re not disappointed. doesn’t make for a very hopeful outlook. i made the mistake of being happy last wednesday. i was wrong. oh well, in a way, guess i was actually right.

Own it.

2006-08-14T21:31:21

i’m completely stressing about the building. i know it’s a good investment and this and that but we’re about to take on some more debt and we don’t have a lot of cash in the kitty. just repaired some flooring and what not and cleared out a nice piece of padding. i’ve been sitting on my ass the last year and a … uh I guess almost two years in october. so i own that failure. i haven’t been saving money or working on my place. so if i get priced out of this place i need to be able to rent it out. to do that i need to make major modifications. to do that i have to have motivation or money. so that means it’s time to stop spending and start working. i don’t have a plan. never do. i tend to shoot first and ask questions later. or probably more accurately, don’t shoot at all and don’t ask questions later, just worry and brood. so anyways. i own it. not the building but the situation.

so such long day

2006-07-30T22:48:19

tired. had a great weekend with family goings on. got completely fragmented. bent. split. polluted last night at awis’ 21st birthday. oh it was jules’ wedding too. great time. they threw a good pary which is something i figured those two were good at. just seemed like they have a good time. i was binging pretty hard. got to a point where there was karaoke and long heartfelt confab with my bro. i actually tapped out. that never happens.
so anyway got a wakey from kris and things were not looking good for an honorable lift-off. i haven’t been hung over in a while which means my body has just flown the white flag figuring there’s no use, i’ll always fight back by tipping the bottle again. so a little later deej and bexter came in to awake the beast. i wasn’t tryin a hear dat scene. so she went and foraged for some addy to shrink my grey a bit. then i woke up and voided my bowels then my gut. by the time i completed my floor routine, bex and dex showed up. i popped it then asked her for a few more minutes. planned to leave at 11 AM it was 10:25. Round a bout 10:45 moses and dex showed up for the final lift off. matt packed my crap while i de-loused (another life saver). was feeling better. got on the road with john and dom by 11:08..late.. but respectable. stopped off for a coffee and a few glazers for the ride.
we took a pretty long ride and arrived at dina’s two hours later. bit into the hair of the dog and hung with the other side. had a great homemade pasta dinner. lined the stommy something fierce. left for NT and hung with the boyz on the porch once we got settled. nodded off a bit. good speaks with the gents then took another shower.
left for bklyn. got here. played some terrible guit and having some night cap. trying to bring it down. tired. not sleepy but real tired. I’m glad i have work tomorrow so that i can catch up on some sleep and get ready for next weekend. it was great to see everyone this weekend.